In Living Memory
by mdelpin
Summary: Natsu gets hits by a Death Curse during a job and Porlyusica and Wendy can't do anything to help. Gray summons a devil to cure Natsu. All it will cost him is his memories of their life together. This is my 7th entry for When We Take Different Paths (wwtdp), an @ftlgbtales event on tumblr. This for Day 14 Memories. Check out @ft-wwtdp to see more stories from FT LGBT authors.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: All Fairy Tail Characters Belong to Hiro Mashima

When We Take Different Paths Week 2 MLM/Slash

Pairing: Gray x Natsu

Prompt: Memories

In Living Memory

"I can't believe you're getting married before I am," Lucy said looking at the two of us wistfully.

"I can't believe the two of you are getting married," Erza shook her head, her smile warm and proud. She'd already smashed us against her armor when she'd heard the news.

Happy snickered and let out one of his favorite phrases to say whenever he was around us. "They're in loooooooooooooove!." He smiled at us as he munched on his fish. He had been the first we had told and that had made him feel secure in his place. He couldn't be happier.

Natsu grunted at him and held on to me for dear life as the train started moving, and his motion sickness began to affect him.

"Shh love, I've got you." I kissed the top of his head and placed my hand on the back of his neck letting the cold relax him and cool him down enough to overpower his nausea. He molded himself against me with a small grunt of thanks. I smiled into his head as I kissed it again."I'll always have your back."

I still couldn't believe that he had agreed so readily. I looked down at the rings that were on both our fingers. Neither one of us had wanted to come on this job, but Lucy needed rent money, and we couldn't just abandon her, not even to celebrate our engagement. We were going to have a party at the guild when we returned though.

We arrived at our destination. There was nothing out of the ordinary at first. We had been walking hand in hand, laughing at each others' stupid jokes, still too drunk on the events of the previous night to bicker about anything.

The girls were walking ahead of us to give us some privacy. We were just headed to the hotel before we started looking for the members of the dark guild we were supposed to take down. But Natsu, he's always alert with those damn senses of his, and he must have heard something because next thing I knew he was running as fast as he could towards Lucy.

I chased after him, ready for a fight the moment I noticed he was focused on something, but I was left behind as he propelled himself using his flame jets. He was just in time to position himself in front of Lucy, arms crossed in a blocking stance.

It all happened so fast.

The rest of us stood there, ready to fight, but not knowing what we were up against. The first attack came, seemingly out of nowhere. It was a tremendous burst of magic, black in color and carrying an overwhelming smell, like rotting meat. It was like no magic we'd ever encountered before, and it went right through Natsu's block and straight through his chest.

He wobbled briefly, shaking his head as if to clear it before going on a full out assault on the five men that had managed to surround us as we'd watched the initial attack on Natsu. They were all wearing the same style of black cloak, the mark of their guild emblazoned on it. It was the men we had been looking for, they had somehow found us first.

We were all a bit shaken at how quickly the attack had pierced Natsu's block, but we fought hard, our years of training moving our bodies in familiar patterns. Natsu took out the mage that had attacked him while the rest of us went after the others. The Rune Knights arrived quickly probably alerted by the sound of fighting.

We'd managed to complete our job before we even checked in to a hotel. We'd all started talking excitedly about the party that would begin as soon as we returned to the guild when we first noticed that Natsu wasn't alright.

He'd stopped in the middle of the road, his hand going up to his chest, covering the spot where he'd been hit. I moved it out of the way and saw a black emblem disappear, seemingly absorbed into his skin.

His breathing was ragged, but he smiled at me and told me he was fine. He grabbed my hand and squeezed, pulling me towards the train station, I should have known then. Natsu Dragneel did not willingly head towards transportation unless something was very wrong.

I felt him slow down, but he played it off as waiting for the girls. Happy and I shared a look. By the time we got back to the station, his skin was clammy, and I was helping him walk. I looked at the schedule desperately, the town we were in was tiny. It had no hospital that could deal with magical injuries, but Magnolia was only an hour away by train. It was only when I realized that I couldn't read the words in front of me that I realized I was crying.

Lucy stood in front of me and looked at the schedule. I felt Erza put her hand on my shoulder as she hovered over Natsu, like the older sister she had always been. I saw the concern in her eyes and that cemented it more for me than anything else.

My insides felt colder than anything I'd ever experienced before, I'd always heard of fear leaving you cold, but I'd never felt how true that was until that moment.

Lucy told us there would not be a train departing for another hour. We all huddled together, watching as Natsu deteriorated more and more. An old woman had seen us and ushered us towards the bench she had been sitting on. We laid Natsu on it. Soon after he began to bleed out of his eyes, nose, and ears but he would not let go of my hand.

Happy and I looked at each other in desperation, both of us desolate and unused to doing nothing.

"I'm going to fly him back to Fairy Tail." Happy cried. "Wendy can help him, I just know it!'

"Happy, I know you want to help, but it's a long distance. I don't think you can make it carrying Natsu." Erza told him as she petted him gently. She was holding on to Natsu's other hand. I could have sworn that hers looked paler than mine as if Natsu was sharing with her what he wouldn't with me.

"I don't care, I have to try!" Happy sobbed. "We have to do something, or it'll be too late. Gray, please!"

"Take him, Happy." I knew Erza was right, but I was selfish. I needed Natsu to be ok, even if it was at Happy's expense.

Lucy stood off to the side, her hands in a constant wringing movement and her eyes fixed on the ground. I knew one of us should talk to her, tell her that we didn't blame her. That Natsu would have done the same for any of us, but I couldn't worry about her now. She could wait, I wasn't sure Natsu could.

"I'll always love you, Ice Princess." The words sounded strange, almost gurgly as we helped him sit up. Blood was dripping out of his mouth, but I kissed him anyway. Kissed him like I've never kissed anyone before as if my entire existence was dependent on it. He must have felt the same because he kissed me back the same way. Like we needed to imprint the kiss into our souls, or we might never know each other again.

I hugged him as tightly as I could without making his condition worse, then I lied to him for the first time. "Everything's going to be ok, Flame Brain." I'm sure he knew, I never could use his name if I didn't mean it.

"I'll see you at the party," he told me with his smile, the one that my world revolved around and I wanted to believe him so badly. I wished I could possess his unshakeable optimism, but life had never been particularly kind to me and I was in the middle of reliving my biggest heartache.

Happy gave me his most determined look. "I'll get him there in time, I promise."

I watched him fly away with my heart, and I begged every deity I knew to watch over him, but when I got back to the guild, I learned that gods no longer exist. Neither Wendy nor Porlyusica had been able to help him. Natsu had been hit with a Death Curse, and he was going to die at any moment.

"Is that what you wanted?" Gray snarled at the creature that was standing by Natsu's bed. He wiped at his eyes uselessly, his tears refusing to retreat.

If gods wouldn't help him, he'd had no problem asking the competition for help. It hadn't been hard, a stolen book from the guild library, a name, a few ingredients.

The first thing that had surprised Gray when his summons of the devil called Nergal had been answered was how nondescript the devil looked. He had the outward appearance of a human male. Average height, average weight, shoulder length dark brown hair. In fact, the only thing that even hinted that he was anything other than human was his eyes. They were black, a thick black devoid of any reflecting light. The second had been how quickly the creature had agreed to help.

He should've known it had been all too easy, but he didn't care as long as he could find a way to save Natsu. He would deal with the repercussions later.

"Oh yes! That will do nicely." Nergal said as he licked his lips in anticipation. Gray shuddered at the implication but he couldn't back out now, not if he had the ability to cure Natsu.

"Such strong feelings! I think we have a lot to work with here, oh my yes!" The devil grinned giving the ice mage a rather good view of his very sharp teeth. "I'm so thrilled you summoned me."

Nergal was in front of him, moving faster than the human eye could track, and Gray found himself suddenly surrounded by the sickening smell of sulfur mixed with bubble gum. He had but a second to think about the fact that Natsu would surely have vomited at the stench before a clawed hand was pressed to his forehead.

Gray had but an instant to startle at the devil's sudden appearance before he found himself screaming in agony as the memory was torn from his brain. His head throbbed long after the disgusting hand and smell were removed, and he felt shaky, but what he felt most of all was a loss. A part of him had been taken, never to return. What had he given up? He had no way of knowing.

"You've done your part, time for me to do mine." Nergal made his way over to Natsu slowly enough to get on Gray's nerves. He fought against every instinct he possessed that was screaming at him to keep the devil away from his love.

Gray looked over at his fiance, lying in the infirmary bed. He was still slowly hemorrhaging, his body occasionally shaking. Natsu had not said anything since his final words at the..where had they been?

Gray didn't even know how much of Natsu was still in there, but he had to try to get him back. There was no way he would ever give up on him. They were going to share the rest of their lives dammit, they'd planned it, and no fucking disease was going to take that away from them. So he kept himself under control while watching to make sure the devil was not trying to make things worse.

"I didn't realize how bad off he was." Nergal immediately said as he looked down at Natsu's body. "This is a rather nasty curse."

Curse, what's he talking about, Natsu was just sick wasn't he?

"Don't you dare back out of our deal, you bastard," Gray growled, immediately getting into his battle stance, hands at the ready.

"Relax, I didn't say I couldn't do it, did I? It's just going to take longer than I thought." Nergal looked at Gray with black, dead eyes that still managed to look greedy. "And of course, I will need more payment."

"You sonofabitch!" Gray hissed, "That wasn't our deal!"

"Let me show you what I'm capable of." Gray saw a flash of teeth that was meant to look like a smile but made the devil look bestial.

Nergal placed both of his hands, claws no longer visible, over Natsu's body. They began to glow, and Gray observed, with ever growing hope, as some of the black sickness came out of his lover's body and became absorbed by the devil's hands. The bleeding appeared to stop, and the once deathly pale body regained some color.

"Would you want me to keep treating him, or should I stop?" Nergal looked at him, his head tilted to the side as he waited for an answer. "After all, memories are such little things."

Gray couldn't argue with the results. He thought about it, how much longer could it take? Gray had plenty of memories. He and Natsu had known each other most of their lives after all.

"Not all memories are equal, wizard. The more emotions associated with a memory, the more power I get to help your love."

Nergal winked at him as if he knew what Gray had been thinking. Gray supposed it wasn't an uncommon ploy in the devil's line of business.

"Alright." Gray agreed, his heart already mourning the imminent loss while he still could. There was no other choice to be made, no price too steep at this point. He was all in.

"No games, either you keep your end of the deal, or I will make it my mission to end you." Gray threatened, letting his arms become covered in the marks of his Devil-Slayer magic to bring home his point.

"No need for violence wizard, I am bound by my word." the creature bowed to Gray.

"Now that I know what I'm dealing with, I need to prepare appropriately. I shall return tomorrow night. Make sure we are not disturbed."

Gray wondered what he had gotten himself into, he was betting on Natsu's Dragon Slayer regenerative abilities to help the healing along. That was his ace in the hole. He had a bad feeling Nergal was going to try to milk him for as much as he could get.

His head was still throbbing, and he was exhausted. Gray changed Natsu's bandages and stripped down to his underwear, climbing into the bed and holding Natsu close.

"I know you'd hate this, but you look so much better already. Please don't be mad."

Gray liked talking to Natsu, it made it feel like the Dragon Slayer was there with him, even if he couldn't answer, yet. He kissed Natsu as he had done every night for the last few years and whispered his secret before falling asleep.

"Please come back to me, I need you."

To Be Continued... 


	2. Chapter 2

Gratsu Bingo 2019

Prompt: Scream

Chapter 2

Porlyusica had visited early the next morning, determined to see if she could make Natsu's last hours more comfortable. Despite how much they bickered, and her natural dislike of humans Natsu was someone she'd always been grudgingly fond of.

She'd been treating Natsu since he was a young child and with his penchant for getting in trouble, she saw him more than just about any other mage in the guild. Many of the members of the guild were surprised at the genuine sorrow on Porlyusica's face when she looked down at the boy sleeping on the infirmary bed. Not Gray.

He was well acquainted with how the little bastard could sneak under all your defenses and make himself a permanent home in your heart. After all, wasn't that exactly what had happened to him? No matter how much Gray had fought at first, Natsu had been unrelenting until Gray'd had no choice but to surrender to the feelings he'd suppressed for so long. And now, now all he wanted to do was beat himself up for all the time he'd wasted being stubborn.

Porlyuisica shooed Gray out of bed long before he was ready, pointedly looking away when he kissed the unconscious mage good morning. She was mildly surprised at Natsu's slight improvement, but she didn't seem to think it would make any difference to the eventual outcome.

Gray bit his lip at her diagnosis, wondering if Nergal was playing him for a fool, but the fact remained, there _had_ been an improvement. Even Porlyusica had admitted it. He had no choice but to continue with his plan to get Natsu back.

"Happy, I need your help," Gray had finally managed to get the Exceed away from the others, and it hadn't been an easy task. There was a line of people waiting to see the Fire Dragon Slayer that reached all the way to the guild's entrance and beyond as word got out of what had happened. Hell even Totomaru had shown up.

Everyone was so ready to say goodbye, and on their way out they'd offer Gray their condolences like Natsu wasn't still alive on that bed. It made Gray furious, he would _not_ become a widow before they even had a chance to get married. Natsu had never given up once in his life, and it was insulting for them to do so so quickly.

"Aye, sir," Happy replied, but it was only a shadow of his usual response.

Gray looked around the guild and decided it was much safer to have this conversation elsewhere. There were too many dragon slayer ears around, and he was pretty sure they would try to stop him or even worse tell Erza what he was up to. They walked outside, both heading to the river where he and Natsu had spent so many hours fighting with Happy cheering them on. Once he was sure they were alone, Gray sat down and gestured for Happy to do the same.

"I found a way to help Natsu," Gray explained and told Happy everything he'd done.

Happy looked at him, eyes wide with alarm. "Gray, you know he wouldn't want this."

"I don't care what he wants!" Gray snapped before gazing at Happy pleadingly, "I can't just let him go, not like this."

"But your memories," Happy sighed not liking anything about this situation.

"We can make new ones," Gray assured him, "It's not such a big thing."

He tried not to see the pity in Happy's eyes at the blatant lie.

"What can I do?"

"I just need you to watch Natsu, make sure Nergal doesn't try to pull a fast one," Gray explained, "You're the only one I can trust with this, I don't know what he's going to take from me, I need someone there who knows what's happening and won't try to stop it."

"Gray…" Happy pleaded with him, "Maybe it's best to just let him go."

"NO! Natsu would never give up on me, I'm sure as hell not going to give up on him. Not now that I know there's a way to get him back. Besides, I'm counting on his regeneration kicking in before Nergal can take it all."

"I don't like it, but I'll do whatever you need," Happy sighed, knowing it was pointless to argue once Gray had made up his mind about something. "He'd do something just as stupid for you."

"Thanks, Happy."

Xxx

Gray spent the rest of the day sitting by Natsu's bedside, holding his hand and continuing to watch the seemingly endless parade of people visit his love, wanting to say their goodbyes. He tried to hide his rage, but from the concerned looks he was getting from Cana and Erza knew he was mostly failing.

As evening neared, Gray left Natsu with Happy and went downstairs for a quick dinner before anyone could get on his case. He could feel the weight of many stares on his back as he ate, but thankfully, no one approached him with empty words.

He asked Erza to please send visitors away as he wanted to spend some time alone with Natsu and thankfully she agreed without too much fuss.

Gray made his way outside, sitting on the steps of the guild's back entrance staring blankly at the vibrant colors of the sunset. He was scared, no sense in lying to himself about that, he could see the way his fingers trembled as he tried to light a cigarette.

He smoked cigarette after cigarette in a futile attempt to calm his nerves. He thought about his memories, immersing himself in them one last time before they were wrested from his brain. He laughed as he remembered some of their fights when they were little, they'd been so childish and full of passion even back then. There were so many memories he wanted to keep to himself, but he had a feeling that those were the ones the devil was the most hungry for.

Gray stood up once it was fully dark. He took a deep breath before making his way upstairs. In a few hours, Natsu would be back in his arms, and everything would go back to the way it was supposed to be. He pictured the smile Natsu gave him in their most private moments and let it give him all the strength he needed to get through this night.

Xxx

Natsu could hear a voice trying to talk to him urgently. He thought it might be Happy, but it was too far away for him to be sure. It felt like his entire being was swimming through a viscous liquid. It dulled his senses, and he didn't like it.

He tried to focus all of his energy on making out the words as best he could.

\- _know_ _if you can hear me_

 _-you need to fight..._

 _-Gray…stupid... again_

 _\- before it's too late_

What had happened? He remembered getting off the train and sensing that strange magic directed at Lucy and without any other thought he'd taken off leaving Gray behind.

Everything after that was hazy, he knew there had been a fight. Had they won? What had happened to him?

He thought harder, his head pounding from the effort. The magic had pierced his block, and it had hurt like hell, making his body feel like it was burning from the inside. Then, nothing…

Was Gray, okay? He'd never forgive himself if his actions had caused his mate harm. Just as he finished that thought, he felt a gentle pressure on his lips. It was cold, but it heated his body, a response both familiar and full of promise.

Gray, he'd know those lips anywhere.

 _Hold on...longer... together soon_

 _... love you_

What the hell was going on?

He could feel his magic fighting against something inside his body, but it seemed to only be keeping it at bay. Everything was so dark, and he couldn't move a muscle, but the pain was indescribable. It felt like his body was attempting to deconstruct itself.

Natsu was not the type of person to admit he was scared, but there was no other word for the panic he was feeling. He was helpless and if felt like he needed to wake up right the hell now. Something in both Happy and Gray's voices made that clear.

He felt another presence enter the room, it reeked of sulfur and bubble gum? Who was that?

 _Are you... Devil Slayer?_

 _...the crap..do this_

 _...worry...no one… hear…. spell_

Natsu wanted to scream in frustration, what was happening. Why did everything sound so far away, no matter how hard he focused?

More words were exchanged, but he couldn't make them out, the more agitated he became, the louder the sound of his own body became. His heartbeat thrummed in his ears, and he swore he could feel the blood moving through his veins.

He needed to calm down, to regulate his body as much as possible so that he could hear what was happening in the room.

He felt hands on his body, and they were not Gray's, it angered him. Why would Gray let some stranger touch him, especially one that smelled so foul? They seemed to be drawing something on his chest, and it felt viscous, just like whatever was already inside him. Once the pressure was removed, the pain in Natsu's body increased tenfold.

He could sense his magic instinctively fighting against whatever was trying to fuse with it. He felt bitterly cold as the two different types of magic battled for dominance of his body. His body shut down, and once again, he was trapped in the darkness.

Natsu didn't know how long he'd been out or what had finally woken him. He extended his senses, feeling stronger than he had before.

 _Stopped…Galuna... Iced Shell… first time_

 _Don't...shy….only strongest…._

There were those voices again. One was clearly Gray, but he had no idea who the other was.

 _..tsu...have...fight…_.

Natsu felt something wet on his face and was confused. Why was Happy crying? He tried to move and felt some give in his hands, but his legs remained motionless. Ugh, this was so frustrating.

The first thing he heard clearly was a blood-curdling scream, followed by sobs.

Who was crying? Was it just Happy, or was it Gray too? That scream! He recoiled when he recognized it. That was Gray!

Someone was hurting Gray, and he was lying on a bed like a fucking rag doll! He could feel the fury build within him, fueling his magic further. Natsu could feel it lashing out at whatever the hell was keeping him from his mate. It felt different though, and he began to thrash on the bed, desperately fighting to move.

 _Shh...look…him... better...keep going_

Natsu still couldn't see, but his ears finally cleared up. With dismay, he could hear Gray telling someone all their most secret moments. Each time followed by that awful scream. And every time without fail his magic would make more headway against whatever was holding him prisoner in his body.

He remembered the first words he'd heard Happy utter and with a sinking heart understood their meaning. Gray had gone and done something stupid again. He might not be the smartest mage in the guild, but there were some things he could understand instinctively. Gray's willingness to sacrifice himself for those he loved was one of them.

Someway, somehow by telling this man their most intimate secrets Gray was helping him fight. This was dark magic, and Natsu knew that magic of this type always came with a steep price. He couldn't wait to break free so he could show his foolish fiance precisely what he thought of his shitty plan.

Natsu didn't know how much more of this he could take, he willed his magic to work ever faster as Gray's voice had become hoarse. How long had he been at it now, hours?

He continued to engage the enemy within so he could free himself from its chains, once that happened there would be no place on this Earth this man could hide from him. He was going to pay for making Gray scream like that.

When Natsu heard Gray begin to tell about how he'd proposed, the joy he'd felt when Natsu said yes and how they'd made love in the moonlight for hours, he panicked, immediately sensing they were running out of time. He could hear the tears in Gray's voice, the tiredness, and the love and he'd had enough.

The fear and fury inside him built up into a crescendo until it could no longer be contained within his body. He felt something snap inside of him, and he was already moving, flames covering his body, burning away at the sigil that had been drawn on his chest. Natsu moved with single-minded purpose, his gaze fixed on the man that dared put his hand on Gray's forehead.

He ran towards them, already readying his first spell when Gray screamed one last time and even though he barely had any voice left to give it form, it rang loudly in Natsu's ears. Gray's eyes rolled to the back of his head, and he collapsed into the chair he'd been sitting on.

Happy had already flown to Gray's side, calling out his name. When he nodded at Natsu that the ice mage was okay, Natsu turned his attention to the one responsible.

"YOU! What did you do to him?" " Natsu grabbed the man by the collar of his jacket, slamming him against the nearest wall, unable to contain the rage that was itching for release.

"ANSWER ME!" Natsu roared already having grabbed the man from where he landed.

"Don't hurt him!" Happy screamed, and there was no mistaking the urgency of the Exceed's voice.

"What are you talking about?" Natsu exploded at Happy, his gaze never faltering from the man he'd now pinned against the wall. His eyes burned with an intensity that should have been capable of incinerating this contemptible dark wizard. Except, on closer observation, he could sense it wasn't a man at all. That stink, it was definitely otherworldly.

"He means, Natsu Dragneel," The creature released himself from Natsu's grasp gracefully, dusting his clothes off without concern.

"If you harm me in any way, Gray's contract will be null and void. Your Death Curse will return, killing you instantly, and your lover will have sacrificed his precious memories for nothing." The creature smirked maliciously, its dull eyes still managing to convey amusement at Natsu's plight.

"What do you mean, sacrificed his memories?"

Natsu heard a groan coming from the chair Gray occupied, and he instantly glanced over, wanting to make sure his love was alright.

"I'll let the cat explain." The man disappeared without a sound, leaving Natsu to try to comprehend what had happened and leaving him with a growing sense of unease.

He took a deep breath, he could deal with that later. Right now, he had one concern, and that was to make sure that Gray was fine. He looked awful, dark circles around his eyes made them seem hollow, and Natsu rushed to him, wanting nothing more than to assure himself that his partner was safe.

Natsu wrapped his arms around Gray and held him tightly relieved to see him awake once more. He pushed his face into the crook of Gray's neck, wanting to immerse himself in the scent that for the last few years had meant home. He was surprised when he felt resistance. Gray pushed him away, and he wasn't very gentle about it.

Natsu was confused, but he stood patiently, ready to bear the long lecture that was clearly in his future. For Gray to tell him how he always got himself into these situations by not thinking first.

He would gladly hear that lecture and many more. Natsu still had no idea what the hell had happened, but he knew that somehow they had cheated death once again. They were alive, everything else could be worked out.

That is what he was expecting. What he couldn't possibly have anticipated were the words that actually came out of Gray's mouth, nor the hostility with which they were spoken.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"


	3. Chapter 3

Gratsu Bingo 2019

Prompt: Precious

Chapter 3

Natsu tried to ignore the sting he felt at Gray's words. He didn't get a chance to respond as the door to the infirmary burst open, and Erza, Lucy, Mira, and Gramps rushed in.

They'd all looked at Natsu in shock, surprised to see him standing and after that, the room had gotten deafening at least for him. There were a lot of shouts and cries as more and more people entered the room. Natsu was being showered with hugs, and he was being moved further and further from Gray.

The only thing Natsu could tell as he watched Gray was that he appeared confused by the commotion. He hadn't moved from the chair, but he was observing everyone like he thought they were insane. People began to surround him as well, congratulating him for something he clearly had no idea about, and Natsu sighed.

He had a feeling whatever this was, it was going to be bad. But he was alive, and as long as there was breath in him, he would work hard to get things back to the way they were. After everything they'd been through, they deserved that much at least.

Natsu could feel Makarov watching him, and he desperately wanted to talk to him, to ask for his help, but there were too many people around. He managed to lock eyes with the guild master and received a curt nod in reply.

"Alright everyone, I know you're excited by Natsu's miraculous recovery, but we should let Wendy and Porlyusica take a look at him."

Makarov watched as everyone filed out, stopping Lucy and Erza before they could leave. Once everyone else had left, Makarov closed the door and waited for Wendy and Porlyusica to do their examination.

"Well?"

"He's fine." Porlyusica reported after a thorough evaluation, "I can't find any trace of the curse."

"Curse?" Gray sneered at Natsu, his words laced with disdain, "You are such a dumbass, what did you do? Eat something you weren't supposed to again?"

Natsu ignored the obvious taunt, glancing at Gray sadly for a brief moment before focusing on Happy.

Erza looked puzzled by Gray's attitude, and she was about to scold him when she noticed Natsu shaking his head at her. She pursed her lips in disapproval but remained quiet.

Lucy looked just as confused, but she was too relieved to see Natsu alive and well to give it much thought. She ran to Natsu and hugged him tightly.

"I'm so glad you're alright," she said in between tears," I'm so sorry, I should have been paying more attention."

"It wasn't anyone's fault Lucy," Natsu assured her, kissing the top of her head chastely.

Natsu felt rather than saw Gray's hostile glare, and he smiled inwardly. Gray might not remember what they meant to each other, but he was still reacting to Lucy being around him just like he used to before they got together. It was a small thing, but it was enough to fuel Natsu's hope.

"It's like it was never there, to begin with," Wendy remarked while conversing with Porlyusica, "How is that possible?"

"If I had to hazard a guess, the ice brat should have some answers for us," Porlyusica chewed on her lip turning her attention to Gray as did everyone else.

"What are you all looking at me for?" Gray snapped, and Natsu knew he was fighting off the panic of not knowing what was going on the only way he knew how, putting up a wall and acting like he didn't care. Natsu's heart ached for him.

Happy took one look at Natsu and then at Gray, and he started to cry.

"It's okay, little buddy," Natsu tried to comfort him as best he could, holding him in his arms and petting him softly, "I'm okay."

After waiting for a few minutes for his Exceed to calm down, Natsu asked him, "Do you think you could tell us what happened?"

Happy nodded, "Gray came to me yesterday, asking for my help."

Natsu saw Gray startle at that and while he might be attempting to act composed, his gaze was fixed on the Exceed.

"He said he'd figured out a way to help Natsu," Happy wiped at his eyes still watching Gray dejectedly.

"He'd made a deal with a devil-"

"This is ridiculous, I would _never_ do that," Gray interrupted the Exceed only to receive a concerned look from Makarov along with a gesture to let Happy continue. Gray grumbled but did as he was asked.

"He said the devil promised to help Natsu in exchange for his memories of their time together."

"Time together?" Gray scoffed, "The Flame Brain and Me? Don't make me laugh, what kind of help could our fights be?"

Lucy and Erza were staring at him in horror as realization set in of just what Gray had done.

Makarov looked pained but nodded at Happy to continue.

"He said that the devil had already healed Natsu a little bit, and Porlyusica had verified it. I tried to tell him that Natsu wouldn't want him to do that, but Gray said they could always make new memories."

"He was hoping that Natsu's regeneration would kick in before the devil could take everything. I was just supposed to watch Natsu and make sure the devil was keeping to his part of the deal, but Gray was in so much pain, and Natsu was thrashing on the bed," Happy once again started to cry, "It was awful!"

"I'm so sorry, Happy," Natsu tried to ignore the anger he felt, knowing he wouldn't be able to expend it on the devil, not without making things seriously worse. Instead, he focused on his partner, petting him behind the ears the way he knew the Exceed liked. "We always ask too much of you, and it's not fair."

Happy stared at Natsu pleadingly, tears once again welling in his eyes, but all he could feel was his failure. Gray had been counting on him, and Natsu had failed him, and now Gray couldn't remember anything about their relationship.

"It's alright, buddy," Natsu reassured him, "I know you did your best."

"Anything else you can tell us Happy?" Makarov was rubbing his thumb and index finger against his chin, his gaze thoughtful.

"If we go after the devil Natsu will die, and Gray still won't recover his memories," Happy added sadly, "The devil ate them, they're gone forever."

"Well, that remains to be seen, " Makarov declared before looking at Gray with concern, "Gray, do you remember anything at all?"

Gray remained quiet for a few minutes, his expression thoughtful before looking down at his hands, "I remember making a deal to heal Natsu. That's it."

"How did you know to do this?"

"There was a book in the library, it should still be there."

"Can you go find it and show Levy?" Makarov asked him, and when Gray nodded, he added, "Lucy, can you go with him?"

"Yes, Master," Lucy followed behind Gray as he left the infirmary and headed towards the guild's library.

"Mest might be able to tell us something more," Makarov told Natsu trying to give him something to hold on to, "I'll get in touch with Jura about it."

Mest had gone back to the Council, feeling more comfortable there than he did in the guildhall, although Makarov thought that it had more to do with keeping Lahar with him in some way. He'd never quite understood the relationship that had existed between the two men, but he knew there was more to it than Mest had let on. He really hoped the memory mage could tell them more about what had been done to Gray's mind.

"How are you doing?" Makarov eyed his mage with concern, "I know this is a lot to take in."

"How do you think I feel?" Natsu snapped, "This is all my fault."

"Natsu, you can't afford to think that way," Makarov advised, "I know you're upset, but Gray still needs you, even if he doesn't know how to show it at the moment. You can't give up on him now."

"Who said anything about giving up?" Natsu glared at his Master before crumpling into the bed, succumbing to the pain that was in his heart.

"I could hear him telling that devil everything, and I could hear his distress when it was ripped from him, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't break through the spell fast enough. " Natsu looked up at his Master, tears streaming down his face, "He was in so much pain, Gramps. What he gave up for me, how can I ever make it up to him?"

"I don't know," Makarov replied honestly, sighing as he walked over to the infirmary's bed. "Knowing Gray he's going to hide behind one of his walls until he gets a handle on the situation, but if anyone can get through to him, it will be you."

Makarov called on his Giant magic, making himself large enough to be able to cradle Natsu in his arms and offer him the comfort he knew the Fire Dragon Slayer desperately needed. He kissed Natsu on the forehead and whispered, "He brought you back to us, and even if I don't approve of his methods, I will always be thankful to him for that. We'll just have to find a way to fix this, but I do need you to promise me one thing."

Natsu wiped his tears away as he waited to hear what his Master was about to ask of him.

"Under no circumstances are you to go after that devil, I don't care if he shows up at your house begging to be punched," Makarov insisted when he saw the determination on Natsu's face," I'm serious Natsu, deals with devils are not to be taken lightly. The conditions were met, if it's broken, even by an outside party, it will be as if Gray broke it himself. You _will_ die.¨

Natsu knew Gramps was telling him the truth, as much as he wanted to beat the crap out of that asshole Nergal for what he'd done to Gray, it wouldn't accomplish anything. So he let go of his hatred and concentrated on Gray's sacrifice instead, and the love implied by his desperate act.

"I promise," Natsu agreed before swearing under his breath as he realized another problem, "Do you think I could stay here?"

"Huh?" Makarov studied him confused.

"Uhm, Gray and I have sort of been living together for the last couple of years, I kinda have nowhere else to go."

"Of course, you can stay in one of the guild bedrooms until we figure this out," Makarov assured him, "I'll ask Mira to set it up." Makarov glanced over at Erza who had watched them silently.

"Do you think you can go to Gray's and pick up some of Natsu's things?"

"Of course, Master."

Xxx

Gray hurried away from the guild, needing to get some distance from the voices offering him congratulations and condolences all at one time. He felt like he couldn't breathe, and he was so confused. He was well aware that something was wrong, could feel it in the way things were obviously missing from his mind.

One moment he had perfect recall, but the moment his thoughts went to Natsu, everything became a jumbled mess. His memory jumped to something else, but the edges were jagged, like puzzle pieces that didn't quite fit together. Everyone seemed convinced that he and Natsu were a couple, but that was ridiculous, wasn't it?

Even though he'd been fighting some feelings for a while, he knew Natsu couldn't possibly feel that way about him. Could he?

No, Gray had seen the way he'd kissed Lucy on the head in the infirmary, there was tenderness in that gesture, like she was the most precious person in the world to him. A voice in his head tried to remind him that before he'd pushed him away in astonishment, Natsu had buried his head in _his_ neck, sniffing him in a way that was decidedly not brotherly, but he refused to heed it.

He opened the door to his apartment, the same one he'd lived in for years, only to find it different than he remembered. His apartment had always been spartan, he bought only the barest of necessities. He didn't have any mementos or knick-knacks to clutter his space, never saw the point in it, especially considering most of the time he was either away on jobs or at the guild.

What greeted him when he opened his front door was nothing like that. Where once there had been a single pair of slippers by the door, now there were two. But that wasn't the only difference, there was a rather comfy looking couch in the living room that he couldn't remember buying and his once bare walls were covered in pictures. He recognized one as having been done by Reedus, it was a picture of himself and Natsu engaging in one of their endless fights when they were kids.

Reedus had managed to capture the flames that occasionally appeared in Natsu's eyes when he was all fired up, while also depicting Gray's cold determination as he moved toward Natsu, fist already raised in mid-swing. Now, _this_ he remembered, he thought with a smile comforted in the knowledge that at least parts of his past still belonged to him.

Gray studied the other pictures on the wall, there were some of his team, one of him and Lyon where both of them were frowning, making him think they'd both been forced into it. There were more pictures of him and Natsu, and he studied these most of all, trying to see if there were are any clues that would help him figure out what they meant to each other.

He was interrupted by a knock on the door and grudgingly went to answer it. Erza entered before he had a chance to invite her in. He closed the door behind her.

"What do you want?" Gray asked gruffly, once again trying to hide how much this whole situation was affecting him.

"Master sent me to get some of Natsu's things," Erza replied rather unconvincingly, and Gray rolled his eyes at her.

"Why are you really here?"

Erza peered at him and said simply, "I thought it might be hard for you to come back here. Although I do need to grab some clothes for Natsu." She added somewhat apologetically.

"Well, you're not wrong," Gray muttered as he fidgeted with the ring on his finger, absently wondering when he'd gotten it.

"Gray… are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Erza waited for him to say something more, but after standing in his living room for many minutes in awkward silence, she decided to move things along. Gray would talk when he was ready, there was no sense in pushing him when he was like this.

"I really need to get back, poor Natsu is sitting around in his underwear, and unlike you," she gave Gray a teasing smile, "he doesn't enjoy it."

Gray looked around his apartment seeming lost, "Sure, grab whatever you need, I- I don't seem to know where anything is."

Erza nodded curtly and headed towards his bedroom.

He followed nervously, wondering how different that would look. His small bed had been replaced with a much larger one that took up most of the room. There were more personal touches in here as well and a lot of items he recognized as belonging to Natsu.

His cheeks crimsoned at the thought of being in bed with Natsu. There was no denying it though, not when there was a framed picture of them doing just that. Gray picked it up, studying their expressions intently, having no choice but to admit they looked happy.

"How can I know any of this is real when I can't even trust my own mind?" Gray asked Erza.

"Have you taken a look at your ring yet?"

"Huh?"

"I see you playing with it, but have you really looked at it?"

"What do you mean?"

"Take it off," Erza ordered.

Gray took the ring off his finger slowly, not entirely sure what he wanted to see. There was an inscription etched inside the band and Gray was able to read it easily, Natsu 🔥.

Gray put the ring back on his finger, he couldn't imagine even Natsu going to these lengths for a prank, lifting his head to meet Erza's eyes he finally gave voice to what he could no longer deny, "It's all true, isn't it?"

"Yes, Gray, it is," Erza smiled at him sadly before wrapping him up in a hug. The metallic smell of her armor feeling oddly comforting to him. She pushed him towards the bed, setting him down gently on its edge before sitting at his side.

"I just wish I could remember," He felt lost amidst all his things, and he groaned in frustration.

"I don't think that's ever going to happen," Erza declared gently, "You told Happy you could always make new memories, maybe that's what you should be focusing on now."

"But _how_ can I do that?" Gray protested.

"It's not the memories that are important, Gray, it's how you feel about each other."

"Think of how much you must have loved Natsu to be wearing that ring. You refused to give up on him when all of us did, willingly gave up so much of yourself just for the chance to have him by your side. Focus on that, the rest can come with time."

"Am I even that same person?"

"Don't be daft, of course you are."

They sat quietly for a bit longer before Erza had to return to the guild. Once she'd left, Gray took his necklace and ring off and jumped in the shower. He put the chain back on, but after deliberating for a few minutes he placed the ring in the drawer of his nightstand, he didn't feel right wearing it when he didn't feel what it represented.

He'd covered himself in his blankets on the large bed trying desperately to fall asleep but feeling oddly cold and disoriented in the room that was so different from what he remembered. He was about to give up and go sleep on the couch when he heard an unsure knock at his door.

He could only think of one person it could be, and even though he knew it would be a mistake, he got up and answered it anyway.

On the other side of the door stood Natsu, looking more nervous than Gray could ever remember seeing him, and he was filled with a profound fear because having to face the uncertainty on Natsu's face made everything more real than anything else that had happened that day.

"What are you doing here?" Gray demanded roughly, trying to hide the panic he felt at being confronted with his actions.

He saw Natsu's eyes automatically go to his hand, and Gray knew he'd already noticed the ring was missing by the pain that flashed across his eyes, pain that he immediately tried to hide.

"Natsu…" Gray tried to think of something to say to soften the blow, to explain that it wasn't a rejection as much as it was a way for him to deal with this slowly, without the constant reminder of what he'd apparently given up, but Natsu didn't let him get any further.

"It's okay," he said with a shaky smile, "I was just surprised. Uhm, I just wanted to check on you and to say thank you. Thank you for saving me."

With that, Natsu turned around and walked away briskly in the direction of the guild.

"NATSU!" Gray called after him, but Natsu never turned around, and he knew better than to go after him.

 _Damn it!_ Gray thought about putting the ring back on but quickly realized it didn't matter, the damage had already been done.

He hated that he was putting Natsu through this, in _his_ eyes, nothing had changed between them, but for Gray, everything was different. He closed the door slowly and leaned against it before looking around his apartment, trying to determine what to explore first.

Xxx

"Where's Natsu?" Gray asked the next morning, noticing his absence the moment he entered the guild.

"I sent him fishing with Happy and Lucy," Makarov explained, "I didn't think it would be good for him to be here for this. How are you feeling? It doesn't look like you got much sleep."

"I'm fine," Gray waved away Makarov's concern as he followed him into the infirmary. He still felt terrible about how things had gone the night before, among some of the things he'd found after Natsu had left had been a box of letters Natsu had written him in his nearly illegible scrawl.

Letters filled with Natsu's childish enthusiasm and affection. Some written during long missions talking of how much he missed Gray and how something or other was going to pay for keeping him away from him for so long and others that were much more personal.

It was all so surreal, Natsu loved him, there was evidence of that fact everywhere he looked. It was everything he'd wanted and yet here he was fighting it, refusing to believe that he could even be worthy of it.

Porlyusica was already waiting for them, and she began to examine him to make sure nothing else was wrong with him. She squeezed his hand gently and gave him a rare smile before backing away to give her results.

There was a knock on the door, and Erza entered the room followed by Mest who was looking around uncertainly.

"Ah, Mest my boy, thank you for coming," Makarov greeted the memory mage warmly, "Did Jura explain what was going on?"

Before Mest had a chance to respond, Gray heard loud noises coming from downstairs, and he was confused when Erza gave him an apologetic look.

"Lyon is downstairs, he'd like to see you."

"Lyon? What the hell, did you guys broadcast what happened to Sorcer's Weekly or something?" Gray groaned, the last thing he needed was an overbearing older brother when he was already stressed out as it was.

"I'm sorry," Mest apologized, "Lyon was visiting with Jura when he got the call from Gramps. Once he heard you were involved, he demanded I bring him with me. I didn't think you'd mind."

"It's fine," Gray grumbled, he'd just have to deal with it later.

Erza turned to leave when Gray surprised himself by asking her to stay with him. She searched his eyes for a moment before nodding and closing the infirmary door, muffling Lyon's protests. She walked over to him and grabbed his hand, squeezing it firmly.

"Alright, now that everyone is here, let's get started," Makarov gestured for all of them to find a place to sit down. "Mest, as I told Jura, Gray made a deal with some sort of devil. It was able to remove a Death Curse from Natsu by using and removing Gray's memories. We'd like for you to see if there is any way to retrieve them."

Mest sucked in a breath before biting his lip, "I'll take a look," but it was evident that he didn't look hopeful.

Mest studied Gray, awaiting his approval. When Gray nodded, Mest placed his hands on Gray's temples and closed his eyes.

Gray sat perfectly still as he felt tugs and pulls inside his head, strong enough to give him a headache.

"Did the devil have you recount the memory before taking it away?" Mest asked, but Gray could only shrug his shoulders, having no clear recollection of what happened.

"That's what Happy and Natsu said," Makarov informed Mest, cringing as he recognized by Gray's reaction that he hadn't been aware that Natsu had been able to hear what happened.

"I want you to think about Lyon," Mest ordered, causing Gray to look at him strangely. "Just humor me."

Gray did, he thought about his foster brother, remembering their times with Ur, their reunion on Galuna and the first time he saw him after their return from Tenrou Island.

"That's enough," Mest sounded satisfied with whatever he'd found, "Now I want you to think about Natsu."

That was harder, he didn't know what to think about, so he just peered at Mest blankly.

Noting his confusion, Mest smiled, "Just anything about him, the first time you met, can you remember that?"

Gray could remember a chattering, loud, pink-haired kid trailing behind Gramps and looking at everything with wide eyes. He smiled, remembering how excited he'd been to see another boy joining the guild even though he'd tried to hide it behind that stupid The Gray persona he used to have back then.

To his surprise, Mest was staring at him with sorrow filled eyes, and it made Gray feel sick to his stomach.

"You have to understand that the way the human brain stores memories is not sequential, it's not one complete memory. It stores bits and pieces all over the brain, waiting for a request before putting it back together.

When you thought of Lyon your mind lit up in all the usual ways, and I could see all the pieces, but when you thought of Natsu, I don't know how to explain this… Uhm, fewer pathways lit up, which is already strange considering you've spent much more time with him than Lyon, and all of them look as if they've been gnawed on by a wild animal. By having you recount the memory, the devil was able to easily see all the pieces he needed to wrest from your mind. I'm sorry, Gray, there's nothing I can do. Those memories are gone forever. The one good thing is that he wasn't trying to hurt you. If he'd wanted to, he could have easily destroyed your mind, but he took only what was agreed to."

Gray could only nod at Mest's words, it was what he'd expected, but it still hit him hard. Part of him had hoped that they could find a solution that would end with him regaining what he'd lost.

He'd gotten complacent, as time and time again they seemed to beat the odds while avoiding the negative consequences of their actions. But not this time, and as much as he hated it, he knew it was fair.

Gray could feel everyone's eyes on him, and he didn't know what to say. He'd messed with dark magic, knowing full well what the consequences would be and he hadn't cared.

Keeping Natsu alive had been more important to him than anything else, and he'd accomplished that. Gray was pleased about that at least, and even now, the alternative was something he couldn't bear to think about.

He could feel Erza struggling against his hand and realized sheepishly that he'd been squeezing her hand much harder than he'd intended. He let her go, and she flexed her fingers before staring at him with concern.

"Thanks for your help, Mest," Gray said sincerely, knowing that for whatever reason Mest no longer liked being in the guild and he'd made a special trip just to try to help him out.

"Not a problem, man," Mest shook his hand, "I just wish I'd had better news for you."

"It's about what I expected," Gray replied ruefully, "Any chance you can take Lyon back with you?" he asked in half jest.

Mest laughed, "I doubt it."

"Then I guess I better go talk to him," Gray left the infirmary and headed downstairs. No one tried to stop him.

Xxx

"It will work out, Natsu," Lucy encouraged him, "It has to."

"I don't know, Lucy, I went to talk to him last night, and he'd already taken off his ring," Natsu moped looking down at his own ring gloomily, "I mean I expected him to, but not so soon."

"It's to be expected, it's a big step and you know how Gray is, he wouldn't want to lead you on if he didn't feel it," Lucy realized after she said the words that maybe they'd sounded better in her head as Natsu looked even more dejected than he had before.

Happy looked on, the only one of them who was actually trying to fish, if only because it gave him something to do. He still hadn't fully recovered from the events of the previous day and seeing how sad his partner was made him feel even guiltier for having helped Gray in the first place. He tried to remind himself that if he hadn't, they'd be attending Natsu's funeral rather than trying to find a way to fix his relationship, but it didn't really help much.

"What if there's a way to give him his memories back?" Lucy suggested.

"You heard what Levy said, there's no way to break the deal without making things worse," Natsu reminded her, not sure how to interpret the enthusiasm that was dancing in her eyes.

"No no, that's not what I mean at all, I'm not talking about magic. Think about it," Lucy was almost bursting with excitement by this point. "What's the one thing all of Gray's memories have in common?"

Natsu looked at her blankly, not really understanding what his friend was trying to say.

"You, Natsu, you were in all of them!" Lucy pointed out.

"Yeah so?"

"Oh my God, surely you're not really this dense," Lucy complained, "You share the same memories, you can't give them back to him, but you can tell him about them. Maybe you can even get Reedus to help you."

"So you're saying I should sit him down and tell him our memories?"

Lucy facepalmed, "I don't think that would work, do you? No, I mean to write them down in a book. Oh my God, how romantic would that be?"

She was getting excited about her own idea, imagining herself the heroine of the story, a princess suffering from amnesia. Her prince offering her a book he'd spent weeks writing filled with all of their history. Oh, why could nothing like that ever happen to her? All this romance was wasted on these two dorks.

Natsu wasn't very convinced Lucy's idea would work, but he had no better ones he could try that didn't include fighting Gray in some fashion. "Alright, I'll try it."

"Let's go buy you a book to write everything in and then let's go find Reedus," Lucy got up eagerly dragging Natsu along behind her. Happy, put his fishing rod away and followed.

Xxx

Weeks passed, and Gray's curiosity was driving him crazy. Every time Natsu wasn't on a job, he was sitting at a table with Lucy or Levy writing in a journal of some sort. Most of the time, he looked frustrated, ripping the pages and burning them angrily.

Sometimes other guild members would join him, or he'd go over to Reedus who would nod and start work right away on something or other which Natsu would then add to his book.

They'd both avoided talking to each other since the ring incident, so Gray had no idea what Natsu was up to, and anytime he asked the others they refused to tell him anything.

He'd thought that it would be the perfect way to start a conversation with Natsu, maybe tease him a little bit and see where that took them, but before he had a chance to do so Lyon would drag him off to Mt. Hakobe for training or grab a job from the request board for the two of them to go on.

When he'd found out what had happened and over Gray's protests, Lyon had promptly taken a leave from Lamia Scale and was currently a guest member of Fairy Tail. He was staying at Gray's apartment too, and although he appreciated the gesture, it was driving Gray crazy. He'd always hated when Lyon tried to act as his older brother, and it had only gotten worse since they had returned from Tenrou.

Natsu, on the other hand, had finally decided to ask for help. His own efforts were getting him nowhere. The way he looked at the world was too fast, so although all his memories were there recalling them with much detail was hard. So he'd decided to go to the Magic Council in search of Mest who'd agreed to help him, still feeling bad about not being able to help Gray.

Mest had cast a spell on him that let him have better access to his memories, and he also let him stay in his quarters, knowing Natsu had nowhere to live at the moment. So Natsu spent every spare moment working on his book, trying to make his handwriting legible and his words clear. He wrote down everything he could remember, every single emotion he'd felt. He bared his entire soul to Gray and hoped it would be enough to entice the ice mage back to him.

It took Natsu over a month, but he finished it and made sure to leave empty pages for new memories they could add in together. He was proud of his efforts, he wasn't a writer like Lucy, but he had put all of himself into it, and Reedus had gone above and beyond with his illustrations, even drawing a rather intimate one that Natus was a bit nervous about. It was a picture of them making love in the moonlight after they'd gotten engaged.

It was their story, from the moment Gray had first asked him out all the way through to the last events with the Death Curse and the devil. If he couldn't have his own memories back, then he could share Natsu's.

It was his gift to Gray, an act of true love more potent than a mere kiss could ever hope to be. Even if things didn't work out, he wanted Gray to have it, for these memories belonged to the two of them.

Natsu knew there was a possibility it might be too late but he'd always been an optimist, and with that spirit, he grabbed the finished book and forced himself to walk to the apartment he'd once shared with Gray, knocking on the door before he could chicken out.

The door was opened by Lyon, who looked surprised to see Natsu on the other side.

"Oh, hey Lyon, " Natsu smiled uncertainly, "Uhm, is Gray around?"

"No, Erza dragged him off on some job this morning," Lyon explained helpfully before scolding him, "Where have you been for the last month? Gray was worried you'd left the guild."

"No, I was just uhm busy, " Natsu was disappointed, but maybe it was for the best. That way, he couldn't see Gray's face when he read it, especially if it wasn't the response he was hoping for. He decided to leave the book with Lyon. "Can you make sure he gets this, please?"

He tried not to let on how important this was to him, but the pity in Lyon's gaze let him know he'd failed.

"This is what you've been busy with, isn't it?" Lyon took the book carefully, giving it an almost reverent inspection before examining Natsu so thoroughly it made him uncomfortable, "Listen Natsu, I really do hope things work out for you guys. I'll make sure he looks at it."

Natsu nodded curtly and walked away, heading towards the riverbank where he and Gray had shared so many moments. There was nothing left to do but to wait.

Xxx

Gray returned from his job with Erza earlier than anticipated although slightly sore and exhausted from the mission. Erza never picked anything simple, and she knew he needed to vent his frustration on something, especially since Natsu wasn't even around to fight with.

Natsu and Happy had been gone for a month now, and no one seemed to know where they'd gone, but no one seemed to be worried except for Gray. Everyone seemed to assume that he just needed time to deal with how everything between them had changed.

Except Gray still knew Natsu well enough to realize he'd never run away from a challenge, he always fought to the end no matter what the odds and the fact that he'd chosen to disappear scared him. He wasn't acting like himself, and Gray didn't know what it meant because he still didn't quite understand how deep his pain was.

He opened the door to his apartment, readying himself for an afternoon with Lyon only to find his brother sitting on the sofa, suitcase packed and holding a book in his lap. A book that looked vaguely familiar.

"Going somewhere?" Gray raised an eyebrow as he took off his shoes and dropped his mission bag on the floor, immediately heading to the kitchen to get a snack.

"It's time I headed home, I'm tired of babysitting your pathetic ass," Lyon replied, a sardonic smile playing on his lips.

Gray was a little sad to see him go, knowing that with nothing to distract him, his thoughts would inevitably return to Natsu and the decisions he needed to make. They couldn't stay in this limbo forever.

"You learn to read while I was gone?" Gray sniped, once again noticing the book that Lyon was holding.

"This?" Lyon held the book up slowly while attempting to look innocent, "Oh, Natsu came by earlier and dropped this off for you. Quite an interesting read, I might add."

"You read it?!"

Gray vaulted over the kitchen counter, rushing to grab the book away from his brother, afraid of what might be inside.

"Only the first few pages, I just wanted to make sure it wasn't going to upset you," Lyon was quick to reassure his brother. "I think you're both finally ready to talk, and if I stayed, I would only be in the way."

Lyon tried to hand the book over to Gray only to find his brother staring at it like it held the key to his destruction. Lyon sighed, putting the book down on the sofa and walking over to his brother. He smacked him on the head roughly.

"Stop punishing yourself, Natsu obviously worked hard on this, and you owe it to yourself to read it. Don't forget that you are in this situation because of how much you love him."

"But I forgot, I forgot all of it, " Gray reminded him.

Lyon groaned, frustrated at having the same conversation yet again, "You _didn't_ forget, that devil ripped the memories from your goddamned brain! You didn't betray him, you saved him! When are you going to accept that the only one stopping you from being with Natsu is _you?"_

"How can you be so sure?" Gray challenged, "He left, Lyon, I hurt him so badly he couldn't even stand to be in the same town as me."

"Ugh, you're so infuriating sometimes!" Lyon yelled, "I know because I can only wish that someone loved me as much as this dumbass loves you, and before you say anything, yes Gray, you _are_ worthy of it. Just read the fucking book."

Lyon recognized the genuine fear in Gray's eyes, and he backed down. "Are you hungry?"

When Gray didn't reply he retrieved the book and put it in his brother's hands while nudging him gently towards the sofa, "Sit down and read, I'll just be in the kitchen making us some food. We can have some lunch before I go."

Lyon waited until Gray finally opened the book before going into the kitchen. He already knew how personal the book was. Lyon felt guilty for looking at it, but he'd been so worried about Gray, and Natsu to a lesser extent, that he'd wanted to make sure it wouldn't upset him.

He'd had to force himself to put it down, not wanting to intrude on their privacy any more than he already had, but he hoped Gray would let him read it someday.

Lyon understood why Natsu went away, he would never have been able to write that book surrounded by the noise and well-meaning interference of their guildmates. Lyon had no doubt the two would be back together by the end of the day, and he really didn't want to be around when they made up.

He heard a strangled noise and peered out from the kitchen, worried until he saw the tears streaming down his brother's cheeks and saw that Gray was covering his mouth with his hand. He went back to cooking, knowing it was going to be a rough afternoon.

Xxx

Gray finished the book, his face flushed as he stared at Reedus' final illustration. He could feel his body responding to the image. He couldn't believe that Natsu had done all that for him.

Natsu, who couldn't sit still for more than twenty minutes at a time had written down their entire relationship for Gray to experience again. The good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly. He'd bared himself to Gray completely and had made Gray fall in love with him all over again. He read the last page once again, his heart feeling light for the first time since "waking up" in Natsu's infirmary room.

 _Let's make more memories together…_

 _Will you marry me?_

He got up from the sofa looking around for his brother, wanting to tell him he was going out, but he only found a pot of soup and a note wishing him luck and inviting the two of them to have lunch with him next weekend. Gray smiled at the gesture and rushed to his bedroom. He opened the drawer of his nightstand, quickly grabbing the ring and putting it back on his finger.

He put his shoes on and made sure he was at least wearing pants before running out of his apartment in search of his fiancé, not even having to think about where to find him.

He wasn't disappointed, Natsu was at the riverbank laying on the ground fast asleep, and Gray sat next to him. He ran his fingers through Natsu's hair, urging him to wake up, snorting when he only got a snore in response. Realizing he was tired too he cradled his head on Natsu's chest, letting the rhythmic beating of Natsu's heart lull him into the best sleep he'd had in a long time.

Natsu awoke to an unexpected weight on his chest, and the sound of soft snoring the likes of which he'd only hoped to hear again. Gray was snuggled up against him, his face looking peaceful, a small smile teasing his lips as he slept with his arm draped over Natsu's middle.

Natsu smiled, wrapping his own arms around Gray and pulling him even closer to his body. He leaned down to kiss Gray's head softly, content to stay as they were. It had been so long since he'd gotten to watch him like this. Natsu looked down to Gray's left hand and immediately noticed the ring was back on his finger and his heart soared.

Gray's eyes blinked open slowly, but his smile was immediate, he sat up and looked down at Natsu who smiled back at him dreamily, it wasn't one of his dazzling smiles, but it was somehow more endearing for it.

"I'm sorry I was such an idiot," Gray began, but Natsu was quick to interrupt.

"You have nothing to apologize for, " Natsu chided him, "You think I wouldn't have done the same if our situations had been reversed? I'm not angry about that anymore, I just want us back."

"I want that too, I don't want to miss out anymore. I want to uhm, add more pages to our book," Gray showed Natsu his hand and Natsu responded by kissing him with a force that knocked him back on the ground.

It was rough and demanding, the sweetness of his earlier smile replaced by the ravenous demands of a dragon. One that had been too long without his mate.

Hands touched everywhere they could reach, rediscovering what they had once known so well. And it was heaven. Gray responded in kind, letting his desire announce itself to the one he'd chosen to spend his life with.

Their breaths mingled as they continued to kiss, both feeling the need to join together, to reassure themselves they still belonged to the other. Once they came up for air, they stared at each other with eyes overflowing with desire.

Gray was the first one to stand up, pulling Natsu up with him, "Let's go home," he invited, thrilled when Natsu beamed at the word.

"Home," Natsu agreed, and they both took off in an unspoken race, desperate not just to reclaim their bodies but the life that had once almost been taken from them. They would never take it for granted again, not now that they realized how precious it truly was.

A/N: I'm happy to have finally finished this one. It tried to get away from me so many times but I managed to contain it to 3 chapters. I know this one was kind of long but I hope it was worth it.


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